vtmomof2 responded April 22, 2008 at 12:06AM

  Life is crazy but wonderful.

I actually got divorced while pregnant. Actually I couldn't finalize my divorce until after my daughter was born. We had to go to parenting classes. It worked for me because he never showed up to see her, and I remarried and she was adopted by my husband. I can only imagine it is hard on older kids who know and have a relationship with their father. I have some cousins who are divorced and share custody. I have found the ones that got along with their exes, had the kids who faired the best. I have one cousin who even gets along really well with her exes new wife. Her kids do the best. The one who fought his ex every step of the way had the kids who struggled. Co-operation is the key for co-parenting. They have to learn to let the pass go, and look forward as parents, not as a married couple. It is hard, but I really think it can work if both people are mature enough to think of the kids. I think it helps if the divorce is amicable and for other reasons besides cheating.

  benbaby responded April 22, 2008 at 2:09PM

  Goofing around with my babies - Big and Lil

I know of a couple who got divorced when their kids were older. It took a while for the kids to accept the fact and get along, but it did happen.

  dustbunny responded April 21, 2008 at 10:27AM

  dishing the dirt, cleaning the chaos

go for it while you can...good for you & good luck. I suggest this: whenever you have class, treat yourself to a coffee or something you like. I used to look forward to going to class (even though I felt bad leaving the fam at dinnertime)because I'd swwing through my favorite drive-thru starbucks. It was a treat I looked forward to. Then, I'd hang later with a group from my class. It made my life busier but I tried to get the most out of the experience. anyway, I'm all about the psychological boosters that help me deal with stress!

  benbaby responded April 21, 2008 at 12:37AM

  Goofing around with my babies - Big and Lil

I'm glad you finally decided to take up both. It may get stressful, but with time you will figure out how to maintain the balance. Good luck :)

  vtmomof2 responded April 22, 2008 at 12:42AM

  Life is crazy but wonderful.

Go for it!! I started back to school last fall, and I am about to finish my first year this week. I am going full time, but I don't have a full time job. I work part time as an independent contractor so my schedule is flexible. I take 4 classes, and it can get stressful. But it is worth it in the long run. I have done better now than I have ever done in the past. In my night classes there are a lot of people who are working and taking classes, it is very common. I don't know where you are going, but the college I go to caters to the adult student, and most professors, especially those teaching at night, have full time jobs outside of their teaching. So everybody is in the same boat. They have always been very flexible, and I'm sure you can find a program where you are that is similar. Good luck to you!!

  dustbunny responded April 7, 2008 at 11:30AM

  dishing the dirt, cleaning the chaos

you can work it with a variety of options like weekend sessions, summer courses, night classes and other "working adult" schedules. The questions I'd ask are 1) can you deal with another huge commitment right now? 2) Will it bump your payscale for the job you have now?
3) will it lead to the eventual job you really want? If yes, then I'd say do it. You only live once and down the road don't kick yourself for not following your dream!

  benbaby responded April 7, 2008 at 1:20PM

  Goofing around with my babies - Big and Lil

I completely agree with dustbunny. Its difficult to handle work and studies together. If you quit your job for further studies your work experience is affected. Good Luck to you !